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 Please read if you care about me at all.

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Molly Weasley II
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PostSubject: Please read if you care about me at all.   Sun Oct 16, 2011 12:31 pm

Hey guys.

This is more of a 'Sorry I have been gone but I'm not quite done yet.' I trust most of you a lot. Which is very unusual for me because I have serious trust issues. I don't trust anyone I know, not even my parents. So for me to trust a bunch of people I have never even met? Thats major. And because I trust you I am going to tell you why I have been MIA (Missing In Action)

Lets start back in December. I had a best friend that I trusted with my life. (Notice I do NOT use this word lightly) One day she decideds to never talk to me again. She was one of the only people I have ever trusted at the time, along with my friends Jamie and Ashli, and most of all my dog Bandit. It absoloutly crushed me.

Skipping ahead. As I mentioned my dog Bandit I trusted most of all. This may sound strange but he was the most important thing in my life at that moment. I could tell him EVERYTHING that I would never tell anyone else. He was basicaly my life support. I think you know where this is going. He caught Lime disease that we didn't catch quick enough and developed kindey faiilure. I sat for days praying for him to get better or for me to have a little bit more time with him. Miraculasly my prayers were answered and I got an extra month longer then what the vets thought he would live. On April 4th 2011, my dog, the one living thing I could confide anything in knowing he couldnt tell anyone anything, died in my arms.

About a week after that, is when I discovered roleplaying. I used it to escape reality and try to hide away the pain of loosing my best friend. Not everyone was as welcome as I hoped they would but I stayed anyways. Soon enough people started to warm up to me and I was really happy I finaly had a place to fit in.

The school year soon ended and I was sent off to visit my father whom I had not seen that year. I live in the US and he lives on the other side of the US from me so visiting isnt always easy. Anyways, I noticed I was sad all the time and I was eating less. It was around this time I stopped comming on as much as I used to. Even when I got back from Idaho, and started school again, I just couldn't bring myself to come on. It was mostly because of my battiling depression and coming on to people who, it seemed, didn't really care about me anymore.

As I said the school year started. I stopped talking to people at school and basicaly lost all my 'friends'. It turned out, everyone I had thought was my friend was using me. Jamie started hanging out with her boyfriend more and stopped talking to me less and less, and Ashli moved hours away. So now I was alone to my thoughts everyday, without any real friends. I was miserable in school and found myself thinking about death every second of every day. Don't get me wrong. I wasn't thinking about me dying. Because I do NOT want to die at ALL. I just cant get death in general out of my head.

So I'm sorry for my long rant, but I thought you guys deserved an explanation of my absence. Feel free to reply if you wish.
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Dominique Weasley
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PostSubject: Re: Please read if you care about me at all.   Sun Oct 16, 2011 9:31 pm

Sweetheart, you know I'm here for you, right?
I'm always going to be here for you because I care such a great bunch of a deal about you Dakota.
I'm so sorry that you've had to go through all of this, and that I'm too far away to come and help you through it, but if there is anything I can do through the Internet, I'm here, I'm always here.

Please don't come less on the site, because I miss you, and even though you're going through some really hard and horrible times, I'm sure that if you just try to use the site to escape, its going to be good for you, because on here you have people that care a lot about you, so it won't help you to stay away from those people, so come on the site as often as you can, yea?

Your friends in real life, may seem like they have just left you, and maybe for some messed up, horrible reason, they have. Some friends may come and go, but that just means you haven't found the friend that will stay, but I promise you, out there, there is that friend. It just takes some time, you just have to make sure you don't close yourself off and away from the world, because then the people in the world will not get to see how amazing you are, and making new - real - friends will be much harder, when it shouldn't be so hard for you.

I can honestly say, I get eating problems, because I have had a 'similar' problem, and I just want you to know that you have to eat, I know sometimes doing something like not eating or something more drastic seems like the only thing to do, and some people do it to make sure there is someone that loves us out there and that is very normal because as human beings we need someone to love us, take care of us and be there for us when we feel absolutely horrible, but you are a lot stronger than I think you give yourself credit for, you can easily wakeup, go eat and be yourself, and you're going to make friends, real friends that are going to give you that care and love you need, and be there for you when everything seems to be impossible.

But until you find that person - and even after you find that person - in your life, that can actually come to your house and meet you after school, and doesn't live far far away in Iceland, I am going to be here, always ready to talk to you and to listen and to try and give some advice, because I really love Kota, and you're my friend, never think you don't have friends, even though some of your friends have left you, most of your Internet friends are not going to do that.

Love you loads and a lot more than that.
Sigga

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Albus Potter
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PostSubject: Re: Please read if you care about me at all.   Sun Oct 16, 2011 11:25 pm

Dearest Molly/Dakota,

Always when people say things like this, I get worried. It doesn't matter who, because honestly, I care about every single person on this site. If I could, I would make sure everyone was happy always. But I can't, and it hurts me to hear that you're feeling like this.

I'm not very good with reactions, so I am sorry if I say the wrong thing. I always have a hard time trying to figure out what to say, especially if it's about someone I care. I just wanted to let you know that if you need someone, I will be here. I will make time for you, I am just an owl away. You're part of the site, which gives you a place in my heart. I've known you for, I don't even know for how long already. Please know that you'll never be alone. Even if I live about two days away from you. You're not alone, you're part of the RPG family. The family that grows every day.

Don't be afraid to ask others for help when they want to give it to you!

Love,
Al/Naomi

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Annabelle Finnigan
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PostSubject: Re: Please read if you care about me at all.   Sun Oct 16, 2011 11:46 pm

Dakota/Molly,

You have no idea how long I'd hug you for If I was near you right now (I probably wouldn't even let go).

I'm really sorry you had to go through all that thinking you're alone, but remember I'll always be there for you. I don't think I'm only speaking for myself when I say that whenever you need to talk about something, just tell me and I'll try to help you as much as I can.

Sometimes it is hard to find friends who actually care about you, but remember once you find them, you'll be friends for eternity (or a long time, whichever works.) Until then however remember that you have everyone here that really cares about you, and please don't feel alone, and try to eat, It'll make you feel better sometimes, especially if you have more energy in you. I might not know you for as long as everyone else, but you're like a little sister to me, and a really good friend.

Always remember when life isn't going your way, keep your head up high and try to make the best of it, because there'll always be a better day. I know that might sound sappy and fake but believe me it's true. Again remember I'll always be there if you need help with anything.

Love you lots,
Jay/Anna.
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Lily Potter II
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Location : In Kiamo Ko, talking to Elphaba, plotting a death trap for Dorothy

PostSubject: Re: Please read if you care about me at all.   Mon Oct 17, 2011 12:34 am

Judging by the other posts above, you don't really have any way to say that you don't feel very loved at the moment. We love you, you know we do. And just because we aren't there for you in person, it doesn't mean you have no friends. I promise you at if I could, I would make those bitches unrecogniseable from face-down in a heartbeat. You know that.

About the depression and death thoughts- You might want to remove all sharp objects away from your general person. I would hate to find out that one of my best friends had done something she might really regret. You should really talk to someone about it, maybe your parents. But if you can't trust them enough, we're always here for you to rant to. God knows how much I do it on the CB, I find it a really good stress relief. Thinking about death is okay, might not be totally healthy, but its okay. As long as you don't have the urge to actually go out with it, thinking is fine.

I can't say much to you about Ashli or the other girl, but I could maybe talk to Jamie on FB if you'd like? Maybe then she would spend more time with you? I know what it feels like to be left out and ditched all the time- trust me, I know, but if I could do something to help just say it and I will help.

I'm sorry about Bandit, too. He sounds like a really lovely dog. Sad

Love you,
-Lainey/Lily
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Marina Krum
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PostSubject: Re: Please read if you care about me at all.   Mon Oct 17, 2011 1:17 am

Dearest Molly,

We have not spoken much but I like to think I was insane and welcoming towards you as I am with everyone. I feel very deeply for what has happened to you, and I want you to know that my thoughts wil be with you.

Depression, it's hard, and it can turn out to be long term and enduring. I hope that yours is simply circumstansial, for your sake. If it is not, and is an ongoing problem, then I can sympathise and empathise to a certain extent. It's a hard road, and I have found that it something that you can only fully relate to if you have experience it yourself. It is a long term battle, and it doesn't matter how much people care for you, or how much they try to do for you, you just cannot help it.

If ever you need somebody to talk to, just let everything go, and either nobody else is listening, nobody else is around, or nobody else understands, I am right here for you.

We are all going through our own problems, some aren't as bad as others, but in that I think we are all lucky. Only those who are at the point of desperation, or experiencing troubles and hard times, can band together and fend off at adversity whilst still having a laugh and a joke and running around a chatbox like crazy idiots waving frying pans around. Of course, if anyone else is waving around frying pans, they will have me to speak to about that one...

Yours
Bee x

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Salka Beatrice Ash
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Age : 21
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PostSubject: Re: Please read if you care about me at all.   Mon Oct 17, 2011 1:20 am

Dear Dakota.

I am not good with words like everyone who has replied before me.

But know this, I love you and support you and I wish that I would live closer to you to help you get through these rough times in your life.

Yes, I know this isn't the longest reply you'll get here, but you should know that even though I am not good with words, I mean those few words up there. And that is why you can always talk to me if you need someone to talk to, even though I'm sure I would not be your first choice, but first, second, or even last choice, I will still be there for you.

Love you
-Sigga
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Louis Weasley
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PostSubject: Re: Please read if you care about me at all.   Mon Oct 17, 2011 4:21 am

Dearest Dakota,

So, as the few above me have said about the people above, you don't really need me to tell you how loved you are on this site but I'll reinforce it anyway. I'm so sorry to hear that you've gone through all this, and I'm sorry that you had to go through it alone. I am really glad I know you; you are a nice, witty, just all round beautiful human being and I love you my dear, I do.

So, as everyone else has said, if you ever need anyone to talk to or just need a virtual hug, we're here.

This is a very short post, but that doesn't mean that I love you any less. Smile

Anyway, I am glad to have you back, lovely, and once again, if you ever need anyone to rant at or just want to speak to us bizarre beings, then we're all here, bizarre as ever, ready to listen.

Love you Smile


Ruth/Lou

xxx
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Rose Weasley
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PostSubject: Re: Please read if you care about me at all.   Sun Oct 30, 2011 10:19 am

Dear Dakota,

I know we haven't talked much lately, but I still love you like a sister.

I'm always here for you if you need me, you know that, right? I'm just a facebook IM away!

I'm so very sorry about everything that's happened to you. I've been through alot in these passed few years myself, and I know where you're coming from.

I hope you feel better soon. I hate it when my friends are sad.

Love always,
Emily
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